The Kino Process - by Studiovice

From Ladder Wiki

[edit] Kino

This topic was inspired by Larry. Most of you need to practice touching women. I know that sounds really weird but a lot of guys need to practice kino because it's not something that comes naturally to them. Guys here aren't used to touching women so they hesitate for that split second, or they're stiff when they're trying to initiate kino, which ruins it and makes it awkward. Guys that are good at initiating physical contact have been doing their whole lives. It comes naturally to them.

The reason that some girls say they don't like guys trying to be touchy feely is because with some men, it's very obvious that they're trying to initiate physical contact, and it's a little weird. "OBs" typically can initiate kino because they can do it casually. Kino isn't just about touching a girl, it's about casually brushing her leg, or something, to make her think about physical contact. Kino needs to go in a certain order, otherwise it seems too forward.

First, you want to touch the arm area. Top or bottom, it doesn't really matter. You can do this during conversation, when you're telling them something or sharing some information, or an opinion. The key to doing this is to maintain eye contact with the person and not look at your hand while touching her. Or, if you're talking about something or someone nearby, you look at that person or object.

Next, you can touch the leg, but only if you're sitting. Don't necessarily rest your hand on her leg, because that's weird. If you're sitting on a couch angle yourself to have you knees touching. It's very subtle, but she will notice. If she moves away, then she's not into you. If she pretends your knee isn’t touching her, then you can proceed farther. Touch arms/elbows together: this is when you are sitting next to her, and you both are facing the same direction. You can lightly elbow her, you can push your upper arm against hers for a second, or you can sometimes lean on her temporarily (or longer, depending on her comfort). This is low risk and easy to pull off, because it's not with your hand, so looking at your hand isn't a problem (and it's hard to look at your arm/shoulder when you are so close to her).

If you're not sitting, you can touch her back next. If you didn't have any leg contact, then a good way is to start up at the top and work you way down. Like the arm thing, you can place your hand near her shoulder blades during conversation.

Next, you can touch the small of her back. A good way to do this is if you're walking. I wouldn't advise doing this when not walking though, unless you're really slick. A good time to do this is when leading her through a doorway. This is a good time to judge whether or not she's interested. This is just above her ass, so it's a very sensual spot. If she pulls away, back off a bit. This could mean that you're moving too fast or that she's not interested. If she ignores you, keep going.

Next, is the face. If you're sitting on the couch and the leg thing is going well, you can move from the leg to the face. The best excuse for touching a face is "hold still, you have an eyelash." And then pretend to brush it away. Remember, there doesn't NEED to be a loose eyelash for this to work. FAKE IT. However, look where you're touching, because if you're making eye contact and not looking for the "eyelash" then it's weird. However, after you brush it away, you can make eye contact for a couple seconds. One good way is to place your hand on her temple and brush the lash away with your thumb and then as you're pulling your hand away, slightly brush her cheek in a downward motion with the tips of your fingers.

Now, if she lets you touch her face without pulling away, then she's probably into you.

Now remember, this is just a progression. If you're sitting on the couch talking, you can go from touching her arm to touching her leg, but keep touching her arms sometimes too.

[edit] Things to avoid

Putting both your arms around her. BAD!!! VERY BAD. If you're sitting, you can do the lame, but successful tactic of resting ONE arm on the back of the couch that's behind her. But don't do the yawn thing. A good time to move your arm there without looking suspicious if when you're changing positions. If you're just sitting there, then you can maybe cross your leg, and put your arm behind her. (And on that note, men cross their legs by putting an ankle on their knee, they don't cross knees. Women cross their knees.) If you're standing, after some kino, you can put ONE arm across her shoulders and lean on her, but that only works if you've been teasing each other and you're in a group of people. If you're standing in a group of people, you can just lean on her while talking to your buddies. But watch from the corner of your eye to see if she's okay with it.

Going out of order. I know it seems weird, but if you're talking to a girl and you suddenly try to put your hands on her back, she'll think you're nuts.

Never, ever cup her face with both hands. This might seem like some romantic gesture that works in movies, but no. IT NEVER WORKS.

If you're going to kiss her, DON'T ASK. NEVER EVER ASK. Women hate that more than anything. HORRIBLE.. Just do it. If you're worried, then say "I hope you didn't mind that" AFTER you do it. but don't ask.

Also, if you're going to kiss her, you need to hold her face still. Sounds crazy, I know. A good thing is to put ONE hand around the side of her neck with the thumb just in front of the ear. Another is to lift her chin up with your hand, but DON'T pause to look into her eyes. If you put your hands on her shoulders, she'll turn away. If you put your arms around her waist, she'll turn away. If you just lean in, she'll turn away. Girls always turn away. It's some weird instinct, so you have to hold our heads a bit. The only time it's acceptable to cup the face with both hands is if you're going in for a very aggressive kiss. If this is the case, then you're going for the surprise factor and you just grab her face and go for it. Not for beginners.

Also, girls know how these things work. We're not stupid. If a guy is touching us, it means he's attractive. If we're not interested, we'll pull away. If a guy says, "come over here, I want to talk to you" we know he doesn't want to talk. This line almost never works.

[edit] Kiss Test

If you're flirting, and she's flirting back; if you can touch her, and she doesn't flinch, then you should just kiss her. Try casually or "accidentally" touching her cheek, neck, thigh, or the small of her back. One good line is "hold still, you have an eyelash on your cheek," and then pretend to brush away this mystery eyelash. If she pulls away, you know she's not interested. If she lets you and gives you the "fuck me" eyes, then kiss her. If she doesn't want it, she'll pull away. This is a kiss test.

It’s where you're sitting or standing with the girl, and you look over at her and touch her hair. run your fingers through it or something, whatever you want. if she doesn't move back, and keeps looking in your eyes, that means she's ready to kiss. If she pulls her head back, or looks the other way, anything bad then that means she's failed the test and shouldn't kiss.

As many as you can think up. I would suggest not doing the same one over and over, figure out a new one. Seriously, any stupid shit you have seen in movies before a dude kisses a girl (this is the only time you will see me reference a movie like this) is usually something you could consider doing.

Fingers through hair. Arm around her. Lifting her chin so she looks into your eyes. Etc etc etc..

Combine moments like that with the right words and you just might make her WANT you to kiss her right there, even if she didn't want it or even think about it up until then.

All a kiss-test is is moving in close to a girl and watching how she reacts. Does she pull away, does she look away, does she smile, does she look you in the eye, does she lean in to you, does she give positive body language or negative body language? It doesn't really matter what you do to lean in or close the gap. Women will buy generic fairy tail bullshit kissing body language and eat it up. As far as timing etc, you just do it when the time is right, ie there is a little bit of a pause in talking, and you can feel sexual tension.

Brushing hair from a girls eyes, hand on neck (ONE hand on the side of her neck just below the ear), hand tilting chin up so you can kiss her, hand grabbing her hand and pulling her close to you. Great examples of what to do before kissing a girl

Pretend she has an eyelash on the corner of her eye. You reach to brush it away. While your hand is touching her face, hold direct eye contact for about 3 or 4 seconds. If she pulls away, she won't want you to kiss her. If she maintains eye contact, or if she only does for a couple seconds and then looks down and away, then it's probably okay to kiss her. You could try to kiss her at this point.