Ladder Theory
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[edit] Abstract
The Ladder Theory is the inspiration behind LadderWiki. Written in 2002 by the Ladder Author, Ladder Theory is a psychology theory that purports to explain the basis of attraction between men and women. Although the Ladder Theory was originally written as a work of satire and intended to be provocative, many people have found elements of truth in the theory.
[edit] Overview
[edit] The Ladders
When a man meets a woman, the first thing that pops into his mind, be it consciously or subconsciously, is "What are the possibilities of me having sex with this woman?" The whole first interaction is simply gauging what chances this man has with this woman, and when he's decided how much he wants her compared to how good of a chance he thinks he has, he will rank her and put her on his ladder. The ladder is a metaphorical scale on which all females this man meets are ranked according to how badly he wants each one of them, with the woman he wants sex with the most at the top of the ladder, and women he wouldn't dream of having sex with at the bottom, or the abyss. All other women fit somewhere in between the extremes. Even women he is just friends with rank somewhere in the ladder, because in all reality, if the man found himself with an opportunity to have sex with this woman, it's very likely if not guaranteed that he would take it.
When a woman meets a man, the first thing that pops into her mind, be it consciously or subconsciously, is "Is this guy someone I'd want to have sex with, or is he good to just be friends with?" The whole first interaction is simply gauging if this man is worth her time as a sexual partner, or if he is worth her time to stay friends with, or if he is simply not worth her time at all. Unlike the man, women have a "bi-ladderal" system, or two ladders. One is the Good Ladder, on which all men she would like to have sex with are on, much like the man's ladder. The other ladder is the Friends Ladder, a ranking of all the guys she knows and likes as a friend, but would never have sex with. Ever. At the bottom of and between both ladders is the abyss, which if a man tries to make a ladder jump from the Friends Ladder to the Good Ladder and fails, he will likely fall into, since once a woman has a male friend who suddenly tells her he wants her, things tend to go awry quickly and they split, or the man becomes unhappy and leaves her life, via a NEXT.
The dichotomy of the men and women having different ladder schemas stems from the fact that when a man values a woman as a person to a great extent, even as a friend, it becomes inevitable that he also wants to have sex with her. In contrast, a woman can very much value a man as a person and a friend, but it is entirely possible for her to not want him in a sexual way at the same time. Men cannot understand how they can be such good of friends with a woman and she would not want to have sex with him, while likewise women cannot understand why if a friendship is so strong and good that it has to involve sex after a certain point to a man. The Ladder Theory illustrates the dynamics and difficulties of this social dynamic that has come about as a result of this incompatibility with reasoning between the sexes.
[edit] Attraction
According to Ladder Theory, men are attracted to a woman 60% based on looks, 30% on how easily he sleep with her, and 10% to other factors. Likewise, women are attracted to men 50% based on the man's wealth or power status, 40% on attraction (which further breaks down into subcategories, the largest of which is looks), and 10% on other factors. This section is particularly snide and cynical, and not something completely concrete, as explained below. However, this idea is not so intrinsic enough to warrant covering it in depth in this summary. The rest of Ladder Theory can be explained without expounding on this and holds water, just understand that an attraction ranking system is in place for both genders. For more details, read the original Ladder Theory.
It is also worth noting that while attraction directly dictates where and on what ladder a person will rank someone else, the motivations behind finding a partner can change the way "attraction" is graded. For instance, if one is simply out for a one-night stand and uninterested in relationships, their Good Ladder will be ranked according to how hot, how easy, or how good in bed someone appears. However, if someone is out for a lasting relationship, their ranking of attraction might weigh loyalty and common interests more heavily when ranking on the Good Ladder. Also, finding people who better fit this ideal can always push the top of the Ladder higher. This concept can be used to describe the Good Ladder as being "elastic."
[edit] Intellectual Whore-ism
One of the major tenets of Ladder Theory is the relationship known as the Intellectual Whore/Intellectual Pimp dynamic. This can also be equated with "nice guys", and should be a common observance. A man who is too "nice" and unwilling to show his dominant, sex-hungry side, will instead approach a lady as non-chalant and unthreateningly as possible, attempting to have a friendship with her to prove that he can be trusted first. This is all done with the hidden agenda of eventually confessing his feelings to her and attempting to have sex with her. This also typically involves the man buying her gifts, giving her rides to places, voluntarily taking the short end of the stick at every occasion, and basically being a doormat, in order to prove that he is "a good guy," but generally it translates to the woman as "weak." Then when he eventually comes forward with his feelings towards her, known as a ladder jump, it typically takes the woman by surprise and she rejects his offer. It is termed a ladder jump because usually the man tries to work his way up her Friends Ladder first, and from the top of the ladder, tries to "jump" across to her Good Ladder. But as stated earlier, by this point he has likely been seen as weak and a doormat, not to mention if there was any sexual tension in their first encounter, it's likely worn off by the time the ladder jump comes around. What typically happens next is that the IW will hold on to their friendship, since it's all he has - which is settling for less in his mind - and he typically rises back up to the top of the IP's Friends Ladder, and then stays there, delusionally content, and/or waiting for his next opportunity to try another Ladder Jump.
The man, in this scenario is known as an intellectual whore, or "IW". The etymology of this term derives from the way a female "whore" of the typical sense, readily pays a man with her body so that she may receive emotional returns, which is not always successful. Likewise, an intellectual whore is a man who readily pays a woman with his emotional support so that he may receive physical returns, which again, is hardly ever successful.
The woman in this scenario is referred to as an intellectual pimp, the term deriving logically from the man being "an intellectual whore". Whether the woman chooses to be an intellectual pimp or not changes with each case, but in most cases, the woman is not aware that she is the man's intellectual pimp, or "IP". This is due to the man's concealing of his true desires with her. There are cases of course, where the woman realizes exactly what's going on from the beginning, and chooses to abuse her power as an IP, and this woman is known as a ninja bitch, or "NB".
[edit] The Solution
Most IPs will spend their time talking and being friends with the IW, while he receives no physical return from her, besides perhaps being the occasional cuddle bitch, while she runs off to have her sex with an Outlaw Biker or "OB" instead, and then vent her frustrations over him to the IW. The Outlaw Biker is the archetypical uncaring "asshole", who is hardened, emotionally distant, obsessed with other interests (colloquially, "his weed and his forearm tattoo"), and yet because of his lack of interest in her, he is the one she finds herself most attracted to. She will have sex with this OB repeatedly, and then always air her stories and frustrations over his emotional distance to the IW. The IW will typically respond with, "well he's a jerk," "you deserve someone better," and likewise supplicating statements.
Ladder Theory purports that to avoid IWism and to begin attracting women in an effective manner, one must avoid falling into the IW/IP trap by avoiding supplication, acting disinterested in women he is actually interested in, becoming an OB, or getting rich.
[edit] Legacy
The domain name from which the Ladder Theory is hosted, www.intellectualwhores.com , contains a forum, in which members have batted around ideas about how true or untrue this theory may be, and what "wisdom" might be gleaned from it. Users have helped each other to see situations for what they really are, and attempted to instill "backbone" into their fellow men. Over some time, the theory, known as "LT", has become less and less a focus, so much as a doorway into gaining real confidence with women, and not allowing oneself to be walked over. Furthermore, lots of talk has been made about what makes men attractive, how to become an alpha male, or even seduction techniques, which can be used as tricks in early stages and training wheels toward learning "normal" social skills, rather than using hidden agendas and supplicating to a woman to get what he wants. The concensus seems to be that it's better to be honest and upfront with a woman about your desires, and that it's safe to admit that one has sexual desires for someone, since afterall, women are just as capable of having sexual desires as well - the very thing IWs feared and tiptoed around to begin with.
[edit] Links
- The Ladder Theory - Full original English version.
- The Original Ladder Theory, translated from the original site for archival purposes, wikified.
- Hidden Variables in the LT
- The Pillars of Cross-Gender Friendship
- Common Phrases and Acronyms
- Ladder Disparity
- Window Corollary
- Next and How to NEXT - by themuz
